And this man is the ultimate upholder of the law in this country? Give me strength. What have we to look forward to in our next attorney-general? Apparently, Mr Brandis will shortly be taking up a cushy position in London and, ladies and gentlemen, we will have that guiding light of social justice in the presence of my Federal member, Mr Christian Porter move into the attorney general's role. God help us all.
Speaking of Mr Porter, he appears to be having difficulty with both his position and location. Thumbing his nose at Western Australia some time ago, he quickly moved into a safe Federal Liberal seat and is currently Minister for Social Services, along with his partner in crime, the invisible Minister for Human Services Alan Tudge. Except he has returned to the bosom of his state political family and is currently taking exceedingly nasty aim at the current Opposition Leader, Mr Mark McGowan. Why can't the state Liberals insult others on their own, you may ask? Simply because the entire state Liberal team is slightly on the nose with the electorate.
Anyway, I have digressed. In one outstandingly misguided response to an articulate question from the audience, Mr Brandis suggested the lady in difficulty have a conversation with Centrelink...
One does not have a conversation with Centrelink, George. When one attempts to engage with Centrelink, one needs to set aside half a day. Repeatedly. The almighty procedural mess that is Centrelink translates into multiple explanations from multiple staffers over multiple days. Because nobody really understands how to administer this unwieldy creature.
Another week, another automatic letter changing our assets, our income and our pension. As our assets and income had been lowered (God only knows who by), we expected a slight increase in our pension. But that had dropped too. So, in increasing despair, I prepared myself for another stoush with the well-meaning folk on the Centrelink Complaints line.
In preparation, I had calculated our assets to every zero, written all the information down, collected relevant bank statements and our most recent assets register on the MyGov page and armed myself with the three Centrelink letters for the current month. Bear in mind we still have a week to go in February.
I waited a relatively short amount of time to speak to another poor soul - about twenty minutes or so. I explained our situation again, queried the fall in our pension, queried the insane level of their estimation of our assets and begged for clarification. My appeal into these matters, lodged on 3 February had yet to be assigned to the appropriate operative. There was no time frame, no new information and very little hope.
The overwhelmed young man went to confer with his supervisor for a goodly length of time. He came back and tried to explain the Centrelink calculations in plain English. I was still insisting their figure of our assets was wrong. And I was becoming desperate as he was floundering and I was none the wiser.
Fortunately, the supervisor came on the line at this point. She was able to translate some of the gobbledygook into a language I could almost understand. And then I asked her to go through our assets with me, step by step. God love this lady. We were in agreement until we tackled our bank account. Way back in the middle of January, at the beginning of this saga, we were assured that $96 308 of our settlement proceedings would be exempt from assets or income testing. Because that figure was going directly into building our house.
Somehow this money had not been exempted...
The lady concerned showed enormous empathy. She assured me that she would do a thorough investigation. She estimated that our pensions should be raised by about forty dollars or so. Each per fortnight. And that we would be back paid.
I should have been jubilant. I should have been shouting with joy and relief that somebody at Centrelink was taking me seriously. I had none of those feelings. I was just spent. Again. But I still have to keep going.
I can't rest until this monumental mistake is rectified and we receive the correct level of pension and the back payments. I hope this new Centrelink staffer keeps her word, fixes this mess and phones me tomorrow or Thursday. Otherwise, I'll have to go back to the Centrelink coal face.
This story is one example, Mr Attorney General. My beloved husband's health was wrecked by his profession. There was no redundancy, no compensation. He just couldn't work anymore. So, we manage, as best we can on Michael's Disability Support Pension and my Carer's Payment. In the press, various members of this government have referred to us as burdens, leaners and welfare frauds. Last night, when you, Mr Brandis, hastily assured the questioner she was not one of those "leaners", then we ask, who do you mean?
We paid income tax. We continue to pay GST, local government charges, state government charges and federal government charges. Every time we drive the car, we are contributing to taxes. Every time we go to the supermarket, we pay tax.
I agree with you on one point Mr Brandis. The welfare system should be designed for those who can't work or are ill, vulnerable, disabled or in poverty. These robo debt letters and appalling reviews are not the answer.
Talk to me, Mr Brandis. I'd be happy to share some suggestions with you, Mr Porter, Mr Tudge and Mr Morrison.
I wait with bated breath. Oh and the length of yesterday phone call to Centrelink? A surprisingly compact one hour and twenty minutes or so.
POSTSCRIPT - after this latest ordeal, I had a debrief with a marvellously quirky and great friend. She cares for her husband and her three adult children, all of whom have autism. We became almost hysterical comparing notes. She has been trying to set up a MyGov account for four months to be able to access new funding from the WANDIS.
Like me, she has been dealing with Centrelink for many years. And she is not unintelligent.
So, her comments about our children and their futures were harrowing and succinct. Who will guide them through this mess when we're gone? Or will they just become homeless and die?
Paging Mr Tudge...
And Mr Porter...
And for our final comedy act, Mr George Brandis.
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