Heavenly Beverley : A (Slightly Bad/ Slightly Mad) Jolly Visit from Santa Claus and a Memorable Christmas Sundowner

"We're all mad here", the Mad Hatter informs Alice. Given the state of the world, I often relish a bit of madness, a bit of silliness, a bit of fun. A very long time ago, when I had a breakdown, I lost my sense of humour. An absence of humour in my life was the "Don't Panic" crescendo that I was caught in a serious mental crisis. I vowed to never let my demons kidnap all the laugh-out-loud ridiculous highlights ever again.

Christmas is starting to bring out my innate sense of these precious moments. I have been wearing my festive hat, along with my Christmas Tree necklace for a few weeks now. On Saturday I was also adorned with red jangly earrings, so I can almost sing "Jingle Bells" without opening my mouth.

I gave another Santa hat and some reindeer antlers to my great friend and masseur, Janet from "Nourishabley". The inimitable Jan George arrived at our 4th Birthday and Sundowner, wearing a fabulous purple frock with matching purple antlers. As one does. I am very keen to receive photos of other Santa outfits or accessories to post in this Blog. So far, the main contenders are Linda and John. I failed to secure evidence of Linda's attire, however, I am able to reproduce an image of John in all his slightly questionable glory.

The last week or so have been rather trying in terms of family angst. I hope these issues are sorted out sooner rather than later. In the meantime, the stage was set for a positively joyful Christmas Sundowner and Birthday Party at the East End Gallery on Saturday night.

The weather was not promising. The wind was blowing at gale force. The humidity was brutal and the summer dust, undisturbed until stillness ceased, created visibility problems, streaming allergies and a fire just south of Beverley at Kokeby.

I had attempted to buy a wading pool for the evening from Avon Trading. They had sold out. Disaster. Then, their resident Knight-In-Shining-Armour Marcus sprang to my rescue. He donated his children's pool for the duration of our evening event. That, ladies and gentlemen, is what happens in Heavenly Beverley.

We were set for Launch. All Systems Were Go. Brian Aylward conducted another superb pastel demonstration for all eager participants. He gratefully received a decent glass of red wine before he left as quietly as he had arrived, hoping to return to his Wooroloo home and studio before the kangaroos came out for the night.

BBQ, pool, drinks, nibbles, sausages, chicken winglets were prepared. There was a last minute dash for presents into Santa's Sack. We had a brilliant group of friends mingling for the Social Event of 2018.

Then came an awful moment. Santa was unable to participate due to the trying weather conditions. He and his reindeer had been blown off course. There was only one solution. Without the Real Santa, I was going to have to step into the breach.

I didn't even have a convenient telephone box handy. In the middle of the Gallery, I pulled the very cheap and nasty Santa suit on. Bugger any shoes. Initially, I put on the beard back to front. As soon as I reversed the facial abomination, I immediately began chomping on Chinese polyester or whichever material they employed to mass-produce snowy Santa beards.

So, my career as Santa Claus was added to my CV. I actually find ad-libbing far easier than preparing a script. I certainly didn't hold back. The usual amount of profanity exited my woolly lips and the horrible plastic belt kept falling off. I decided that sitting regally would be the best option so my Santa Pants remained in position. Even so, I heard a rather alarming ripping sound coming from my posterior as I sat. Honestly, a ten dollar Santa Suit that was only going to survive one outing!

I was pleasantly surprised by the footage. With my dress tucked in, I pulled off Santa's physique perfectly, albeit a somewhat short one. I had an absolute ball and I think that the gift receivers enjoyed their minutes of fame.

The food was disappearing, the wine was flowing and the music began. We ended up having a rip-roaring night that was part "Red Faces", part "Australian Idol" and part "Australia's Got Talent". We enjoyed having multiple singers, including the incredibly laidback Lawrence Jones, the divine Jan George, the smooth Neville Dowling (of Dave Warner and the Suburban Boys fame!), the surprising Luke Blanch, the gorgeous Michelle Clifton, the unforgettable Martin Eloury (his version of "Bohemian Rhapsody" will go down in history), the urbane Rodney Gibbs (of Rod and the Rockets) and introducing the young Bethany Blanch in her first performance. What a night!

The evening rocked on. The floor is a testament to the number of new spillages to add to the Gallery's glorious tales over the last four years. I called stumps at a quarter to twelve with the announcement of "Five minutes gentlemen". Somehow, this was completely lost in translation and the party grooved on until a quarter to two...

There were a few sore heads as a result. And bucketloads of thanks. Michelle Clifton and her husband Murray (Muzz) slept in their car and still thanked us for the Christmas Sundowner, even though Muzz's hangover was not a laughing matter. Earlier in the evening, Muzz had also fetched and carried and made himself indispensable. So many of our artists, who are also our friends, graced the venue. Plus Kate, Ailsa and Poppy formed a gang on the sidelines, Lenny and Tyler (our local Artists in Residence) probably had never seen anything like one of our celebrations. Ross's face said it all (a close buddy of Jan and Greg and hopefully one of our artists in the not too distant future)...Martin's wife Janet clapped every performance (including Martin's occasionally frightful singing), Adam and Gem met a Santa like no other, Bethany was an active participant, Lisa was quietly moving with the music, Michelle Rothwell introduced Dave to our throng, Marianne followed calmly in the wake of Rod's aura and we were having the time of our lives.

Yesterday was recovery. Michael admitted his own fuzziness but a splendid breakfast lifted all our spirits. Mardi, who had been present at the Sundowner earlier in the evening had made our home her home, which is exactly how we hope our guests feel in Station House. Others who had been unable to attend sent profound apologies or popped in the next day. We appreciated each and every one of you.

PS our first Sundowner for 2019 will be on Saturday 2 March. You all know the drill. Just get up here and have fun!