Heavenly Beverley : Morning Mirth and Mayhem @ Station House

Moving into Heavenly Beverley's town centre was an outstanding choice for us after selling the House that Rocks, which was situated on the outskirts. We swapped two thousand square metres of garden for three courtyards of potted paradise and one bed out the front of the house. We changed from a house that leaked heat, cold and dust to an uber-insulated dwelling with fantastic passive qualities. Driving to town due to inclement weather or scorching heat altered to a theoretically quick stroll to the shops or post office or shire office or Community Resource Centre.

I mentioned "theoretically" as walking anywhere on Vincent Street usually takes far longer than estimated. By the time I have negotiated my way through several conversations, waved at a few more locals in cars, shouted across the street to somebody else, checked out the latest gossip and concluded my business at my chosen destination, half an hour has generally passed. In particularly, Saturday mornings provide the most entertainment on our main drag, so opening the East End Gallery at eleven o'clock is often a tad problematic.

Living on Anzac Lane, one could safely assume that not much happens outside our home. We are opposite Jazzy's motor mechanical workshop but these are the only two buildings on this dogleg combination of gravel and bitumen. During the day, there is traffic as people come and go for fuel or repairs at Richard's premises. Come five o'clock and our neck of the woods becomes a quiet haven.

The right-angle turn of Anzac Lane occurs between our two properties. The corner is completely blind, so common sense would dictate a slowing down of vehicles as they approach the turn. Bah humbug!

We have seen multiple near misses, with dumbfounded surprise evident as neither of the protagonists ever anticipate that there might be another vehicle approaching. Head on. Keeping left is obviously only a guideline and applying the brakes is not considered to be necessary at all. The reason we built a post and roof only carport was for ease of reconstruction in the instance of demolition by vehicles. We have also had plenty of RVs, trucks and caravans cut the corner across our driveway, with usually a quick prayer sent to the universe, asking our carport and wall to be spared once more.

These are not the only comedy routines we have witnessed outside. Utes, cars and trucks routinely stop in the middle of the laneway and park, so they don't have to walk far for a chat with Richard. Plus, we have had cars park right outside our front door, so we have experienced the unenviable sight of being able to watch a driver undertaking excavations of his nasal passages, oblivious to the fact we can see all of his unpleasant activities.

However, full marks should be awarded to three groups who parked three cars on both sides of Anzac Lane. This was yesterday morning and we were enjoying a leisurely start to the day. Our peace was shattered, as the first vehicle lined up smack outside our door. The second car parked directly opposite, reducing the already fairly narrow tarmac to one lane. The third car parked in front of the second. All three lots of visitors hopped out and began bellowing to each other up and down Anzac Lane.

Needless to say, Stella Bella and Mister Pip both went berserk. The cacophony of shouting and barking was deafening. Those on two legs were either hard-of-hearing (but unfortunately not dumb) or didn't give a toss, as they paid no heed to the canine chorus they had instigated.

The piece de resistance arrived with a white car hurtling around the blind corner and nearly collecting the rear end of the one outside our front door. By this stage, we had dissolved into hysterical laughter as we wondered what it could possibly take to encourage them all to bugger off.

Sometime later, the three groups ended their shouting competition, climbed back into their vehicles and exited Anzac Lane at high speed. We were delighted to see the back of them all.

And our carport has lived to fight another day.