At Last I'm Going to be a Mother-In-Law!

The saga of the Engagement Ring has been subliminally present for the last six months, rather like an intermittent itch on my bum. My hopelessly romantic son, Callum, had devised a "will you marry me" speech, location, and of course the ring, all with the deepest secrecy. In Venice, naturally. I mean, where else could he possibly propose to the light of his life, Bronwyn, other than in the City of Love?

With more stealth than Kingsman, Callum chose the ring for his Intended Bride, even temporarily nicking one of her other rings so he would get the correct size and secretly paid off the Rock. We were aware of this situation, hilariously when Cal needed to temporarily borrow cash from us when a ring payment was due at an inconvenient financially tight moment. To keep the Secret until the Perfect Moment.

I had suggested he could do without the stress the Rock's Secrecy and propose to Bron at any other time over the last few months. With a combination of his customary poise and stubbornness, Cal politely told me to sod off and mind my own business. He was determined to do this His Way.

And so he has. Facebook has recorded for posterity a montage of champagne, roses and the proposal. Did Bron have any inkling of their Special Moment? She may have thought that the possibility was there, but Callum appears to have blown her away. That's my boy.

So different from our engagement. Michael had been suitably reluctant to launch into a third marriage but I was having none of that. I wore him down over a couple of weeks by almost continuously humming the Wedding March. Eventually, driven by sheer desperation for peace, Michael knelt gallantly in front of me (we were both in our trackie daks) and asked me to marry him. My response? "Fuck yeah. What took you so long?"

We then had the briefest of engagements, a wonderfully casual wedding in the backyard of the House that Rocks, including the song "Love Shack", a BBQ for eighty people (with BYO meat, drinks and chairs) and the ultimate luxury of a blow-up wading pool so guests could cool off in the January heat. The groom sipped a double Scotch for fortification at the altar. Callum gave me away. Vanessa was my bridesmaid and Alex was the ring bearer and Chief BBQ Cook. Truly a wedding to remember.

I have no doubt that Callum and Bronwyn will also have the Wedding of their Dreams.  There will not be a BBQ, wading pool or an interrupting sheep anywhere near their nuptials. And Bronwyn is my ideal of a "Heavenly" daughter-in-law. A gorgeous strawberry blonde firecracker, she is quite able to give Cal the Rounds of the Kitchen if he turns into a Pompous Git. Which I have witnessed and approved on a few occasions.

To Rob and Michelle, Bronwyn's parents - I congratulate you both. You two have raised a fabulous young woman. I could not think of a more perfect life partner for Callum.

Now for the Decision. What will I wear as Mother of the Groom?!

Callum has always engaged in some unusual pastimes, such as planking in his kitchen...

or putting himself in the hands of a rather dubious medico.

Bronwyn, on the other hand, appears to be far more refined...

but don't get between her and her dinner!

Before Bron came into his life, Callum's passion was Latin and Ballroom dance

with a touch of Burlesque thrown in for good measure.

Having met, they shared many mutual interests, such as defending the Alliance...

or impersonating the Phantom of the Opera.

 And having eyes only for each other.

And now my beloved son and daughter-in-law to be are embarking on the next chapter of their lives together. And where better to start that adventure than Venice?

Congratulations to Cal and Bron (and Ragnar our grand-cat of course).