Heavenly Beverley : Confessions of a Twenty-First Century Luddite (Does Windows 10 dream when it's asleep?)

Luddites have not been popular as a group, both in their origins and as a derogatory term used in the present day. During a timeframe of five years (1811 - 1816), groups of early Industrial Revolution workers destroyed machinery that they believed would cost them their jobs. This action was particularly prevalent in cotton and woollen mills. The word has now broadened to include anyone suspicious or resisting new technology.

And I definitely fall into that latter category, though there are also some days I feel as ancient as those in that first movement. Having not been introduced to the Internet, e-mail, word processing and most scarily the computers needed to access these pillars of advancement until I was in my thirties, I still regard any communication device other than landline telephones as potentially hostile.

I do not possess an iPod, an iPad or have iTunes. I do have an Android phone, which even after six months still has the capacity to shatter my self-esteem at a moment's notice. I have been unable to download OneDrive, which apparently move photos wirelessly from my smartphone to my laptop. I do not believe that anymore.

When I received my first laptop, I resisted turning it on for six months. I clung to XP far longer than I should have, eventually upgrading to Windows 7. This system proved surprising friendly and never let me down. Onto my second laptop in 2014 after six years. I didn't want to rush into the Great Unknown in an overly hasty manner.

Imagine my horror when I had to upgrade, again, to Windows 10. I had heard horrific stories of Windows 8 and I was dreading any change in my technology comfort zone. Spectacularly hyperventilating, I summoned my courage and Installed Windows 10.

This was not the unmitigated disaster I was expecting. This new operating system was reassuringly similar to Windows 7 and relatively easy to navigate (unlike most Government agencies and departments). Then little snags began to creep in and my Luddism crept back. First was the inability to download OneDrive. Then was the issue to try and delete photos off my SD card once I'd finished moving them into MyPictures. Epic fail. Thus, I have given up on that option and now use Michael's elderly wheezing laptop to remove photos from my SD card. Don't ask...

Just when I was returning to that characteristic smugness that always precedes a catastrophe, the inevitable occurred. Of course. On Thursday night, I dutifully put the laptop to bed in its case, prior to leaving for the Big Smoke yesterday. I may or may not have pressed the Sleep option by mistake. I will probably never know.

Come early Friday when I couldn't sleep, I returned to my favourite slumber inducer and pressed the big blue-rimmed button. The usual screen came on, with a couple of notable exceptions. No clock or day appeared and no strip to enter my password. I tried turning the laptop on and off again multiple times. No go. In disgust, I returned to bed and counted Michael's breathing for the rest of the night.

Upon arising, I turned on Michael's ageing laptop (some of the keyboard letters are actually missing, it wheezes like a moderate asthmatic, shuts down when it overheats and will not charge at all, so it has to remain plugged into power at all times) to search for clues. About a squillion responses came up to my query. All were useless, as the instructions ordered me to access some icon or another on the screen. Which wasn't there as the computer was asleep...

Straight to Facebook on my phone. A great many different solutions were offered. So I tried them all. Then, after my anaesthetic wore off, late in the afternoon, my computer gradually woke up at about the same time I did. First, the clock, date and date reappeared. Then after restarting again, the password strip became visible. Then, interestingly, my latest password wouldn't work, but the previous one activated my beloved screen back into life. Rather like that movie "Flatliners".

I took great care in pressing the "Shut Down" icon last night. I was tense in anticipation this morning and then delighted when the laptop woke successfully. I am very easily pleased. So for the foreseeable future, I will watch myself whilst "shutting down" until I breathe easily once more.

I still have absolutely no idea what caused this malfunction in the first place and I sure as shit have no idea how I fixed the problem. If I did at all...

My final questions. Is this all a glimpse of the future? Are we to be governed by our devices that may choose to work, or not? And what did Windows 10 dream about when it was asleep? Any ideas?

My natural instincts have turned me into my secret identity - Anxiety Girl. Much as I enjoy having my finger on my personal pulse of technology, I am still well and truly, a Luddite!