Friday, 1 July 2016

Twas the Night before Election Day

Twas the night before election day
and all through Australia
we were jumping for joy
every girl and every boy
for the campaign was a miserable failure!

And thus, dear reader, is my excruciatingly awful poem to end the most boring, dirgeful, dishonest and interminable election campaign that has been my misfortune to live through.

There must have been one of two truths muttered around the block, in a windowless room in the bowels of CONTROL, probably within the confines of the Cone of Silence. I was in the loo and didn't hear them. And I was having far too much fun laughing at the abject lunacy of some of the candidates, whilst hiding from the narrow-minded, nasty, vengeful and self-serving bribes the others were spouting.

Elections bring out the best and the worst in us all. Politicians assume we have mysteriously materialised into "Dumb and Dumber". And unfortunately, some of our fellow citizens do suffer a total brain malfunction, thinking and saying really awful opinions that have no link to common sense or logic.

And let's face it, the two main parties are machines. They don't think up original and innovative ideas (there are exceptions to the rule). They do what they are told by their funding bodies - the rich, the powerful and the influential. Anybody becoming a politician needs to remember that fact, to have a thick skin, be able to lie with a straight face and not try too hard to be an individual. I remember a Ms. Katie Hodgson-Thomas, a Liberal politician with a heart. She was my local member, she cared about my situation and she supported me. I think she stayed as long as she could bear it. Never heard of her since. Katie, you'd still have my vote.

Today, our darling daughter rang me out of the blue for advice on How to Vote. After floundering for a second or two, I remembered what was important. Get knowledge, become informed, read about the parties, policies and candidates. Make your vote count, I told her.

And for what it's worth, this are some of my hopes for the aftermath of the election. I am actually hoping for a hung parliament with a powerful force of Greens and Independents in the Senate. However, I am a realist....


  • that asylum seekers are processed quickly, compassionately and fairly
  • that we stop interfering in other countries' affairs and thus do not add to the refugee crisis
  • that we grant a living wage to all
  • that we cease to believe in the fantasy of full employment and value volunteering again
  • that we have a fair health system
  • that we continue to strive for better education for all of our children (in a similar vein to "Revolution School")
  • that we embrace and encourage the arts. When Winston Churchill was asked to cut arts funding, his response was apparently - "Then what are we fighting for?" 
  • that young adults who want to engage in a gap year are offered a raft of volunteer programmes that benefit their own or other communities
  • that all communities honour themselves - have a street party in each community once a year and the whole town/estate/suburb meet for a long lunch
  • then each community formally engages mentors (refugee, indigenous, young, retirees) to support us all at a grass roots level
  • that whistleblowers are protected by law
  • that the poor, the vulnerable, the chronically unwell and the disabled are cared for in a fair, speedy and logical manner
  • that all government departments have enough trained staff to answer our questions on any given day.

the two pretenders to the Throne


the rest of our candidates?


where I was when any truthful promises were made...

By hey, we have alternatives to the duopoly -


Tony Windsor in NSW


Richard di Natale of the Greens


Nick Xenophon


check out the Sex Party's policies


and don't forget Ricky Muir.

Want democracy? Vote for the Independents!


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