Heavenly Beverley : It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World (Again!)...

We are Day 9 into our stay in Room 24 on H4 at Joondalup Health Campus.As far as we are concerned, this is going to be our last day in this not-terribly-fun establishment. As a keen observer of all that is nonsensical in this world, I have come to the conclusion that not all in well in the State of Denmark, sorry, Joondalup Private Hospital...

Let me explain...

We have private health insurance so we have the doctor of our choice in a hospital of our choice. The doctor part is working quite well. We have been confident in the skills and care of Doctor Scott Claxton, our respiratory specialist from past experience. Over the last ten days, we have come to appreciate him even more. He is intelligent and compassionate with a keen sense of humour, a thorough comprehension of how the health system works, offers explanation of jargon and gobbledegook, and is utterly focused on the best outcomes for his patients.

Now to my report card on a few private hospitals we know well. Ten years ago, we gave Joondalup Private Hospital and H4 glowing recommendations. We also gave Hollywood Private Hospital a high satisfaction rating during a similar time-frame. The Mount Hospital, given its age and its famous sauna room, still used to receive a solid 7 out of 10 during our early incarcerations.

Not any more...

The common denominator of these hospitals? They are all businesses, listed on the ASX, all for-profit organisations, all looking to maximise the returns to their shareholders. Joondalup and Hollywood are part of Ramsay Healthcare. The Mount, a Healthscope hospital, is owned by Brookfield, a giant Canadian conglomerate. All this money going in, profits being the bottom line and rewards to their shareholders means the standard of care in these hospitals has dramatically slipped.

Back in 2019, a private room in a private hospital in Australia was around $700 per day for the initial 14 days. I have a hazy recollection of my stay in Hollywood Private Hospital in January 2022 being rather a lot more per day than that.

Our private health insurance costs us around $5200 a yer. We pay $250 excess upfront if we come to hospital as a co-payment, but only once per year per person.We pay private health insurance willingly, expecting excellent nursing care, nutritious and tasty meal options and comfortable rooms. With quality pillows, especially when sleeping or if confined to bed for days.

Let me dispel that first belief. The pillows are shit. My neck is chronically painful from dodgy pillows throughout me boarding with Michael, which of course is paid for by our health fund.

The airconditioning is centralised and cannot be adjusted for individual needs. Hence, we have either been stifling or freezing.For whatever reason, both Hollywood and Joondalup have dispensed with the warm cotton blankets, replacing them with inadequate thin and synthetic covers - probably easier and cheaper to wash...

The food is haphazard in its quality. Forget about hot toast for breakfast - cold as charity and stiff as a board. The majority of lunch and dinner options are fairly bland and always require seasoning. Chicken breast, disguised as roast chicken was tough and dry. Salad has been a tad limp on occasion and sometimes had added unexpected crunch, which Michael dislikes intensely (not being rinsed well enough?) The majority of the meals have been edible but not would I would consider really appealing.

There is no fridge in the patients' and visitors' kitchens, which means my lactose free milk and Michael's sugar free lemonade has to go to the staff pantry's fridge. Patients and visitors are not allowed to enter (!) so I have often flouted this rule on numerous occasions as the nurses should be carrying out more important tasks than delivering drinks.

Which brings me to my next point. H4 at Joondalup Private Hospital is seriously understaffed with nurses. So bells go unanswered, drugs are late or forgotten, alarms drive us to distraction for minutes on end and the ward routines are not necessarily patient friendly.

I believe these nurse shortages contributed to Michael's repeated temperature spikes, which in turn, caused his deliriums.The delivery of paracetamol to him to control these symptoms was frequently too slow or missed. Even though I was boarding with him, there were nights that I was so exhausted that I didn't wake up. One night he went wandering around the ward. Twice, he tore out his cannulas, the second time due to a continual alarm that fostered his belief that by removing his cannula the noise would cease...

Last Saturday, I had had enough. We were moved to a room adjoining another room containing an elderly lady with COVID. Due to her repeated efforts to leave her room, a carer had been attached outside her door, twenty-four hours a day. We were able to take advantage of this situation, allowing me access to an additional person right there.

This little lady obviously has dementia. Having been confined to quarters for the duration of her stay, this morning, pending discharge, she was told to wait on a chair outside her room to be picked up. From 9 o'clock. From isolated (for her own and everybody's else's safety) to literally being left totally on her own, on a chair in a corridor. Where was the duty of care? In my opinion, this illustrated the pure insanity that occurs through staff shortages.

Michael has improved really rapidly over the last couple of days. His cough still sneaks up on him with ferocious intensity, but these bouts are becoming less frequent. He is no longer on oxygen therapy and has good oxygen saturation levels in air. He has had the final cannula removed and is on all oral meds.He is tolerating his CPAP machine well again and his nightly antics do not include delusions anymore.

We had agreed on Thursday for delivery of our get-out-of-jail-free card to return home. We miss our animals horribly and are becoming increasingly concerned about the heat affecting our garden. Sue, our resident fairy godmother, has been juggling looking after the dogs, cat and parrot, the watering and the Gallery in our absence. We were going to hang out for another two days here but circumstances have reared an ugly head and we now wish to get out of this place tomorrow...

Yesterday afternoon, my son Cal rang to inform us that Bronwyn had tested positive to COVID. I had seen her on both Saturday and Sunday, so this was rather disturbing news. Thinking I was taking the right course of action, I informed our nurses. This began a chain of events that in some ways are understandable and in other ways, beggar belief.

Michael and I both tested negative yesterday afternoon and I have tested negative again this morning.That has not stopped certain practices that are baffling to us. First of all, all his drugs were removed from the Locked Cupboard in his room to Elsewhere. The reason given? To reduce the nurses' exposure to us delivering his meds in his room. I would suggest that action is not entirely logical. If his meds had also been exposed to COVID, surely taking them away could expose other nurses...As a result, we don't have a clue where his drugs are being kept, including some that I have bought externally. Do we have any recourse if his meds go AWOL or are not all returned when we leave...

Today, morning tea has been strangely absent. Our room bin now resides directly next to the door, rather than in the bathroom for our convenience. A noisy air filter has been added to the room. And I am still COVID negative.

In the outside world, COVID awareness has been significantly reduced. I think the general population now regards COVID as an inconvenient disease rather like influenza. The view inside Joondalup Health Campus is vastly different. I don't disagree with their caution - I just think that some of the practices in response to me being a close contact, but actually COVID negative, are arbitrary and without clear reasoning.

Hence, I have formulated my Action Plan. We are going home tomorrow, I shall ask Scott later today to write up any prescriptions we may require to continue Michael's recovery and perhaps some anti-virals thrown into the mix, just in case. He has done his job splendidly.

We were content to wait until we felt Michael was well enough to return to Heavenly Beverley. That time has come. And I also believe his recovery will accelerate once we are back in our own familiar surroundings,

A final word. I would urge companies like Ramsay and Healthscope (Brookfield) to divert some of their profits back into their hospitals to benefit those who pay to come - the patients. We, the private patients pay insurance in order to obtain a better quality of care. Just having the doctor of choice is no longer the carrot it used to be, We need hospital experience that doesn't leave us frustrated, bewildered, tired and uncomfortable...Ramsay and Healthscope must spend money on increased and supported staffing, patient meals that aren't cold, bland or overcooked, and updated rooms (including pillows!) to make hospital stays as bearable as possible.They need to remember nobody wants to be in hospital so exceptional care, along with exceptional comfort. Lumpy pillows, squeaking beds, thin covers and substandard linen will not attract more private patients.

Private health insurance uptake, already slowing due to rising premiums, will continue to slid, if private hospitals are not not providing a superior alternative to public hospitals.